Motivational posters

Personally, I actually like those clever motivational posters, but I just stumbled on a Web site, www.Despair.com, which is incredibly amusing. They turn all of these motivational pictures and quotes into demotivational posters:

Introducing Demotivators(R)

MOTIVATION. Psychology tells us that motivation- true, lasting motivation- can only come from within. Common sense tells us it can't be manufactured or productized. So how is it that a multi-billion dollar industry thrives through the sale of motivational commodities and services? Because, in our world of instant gratification, people desperately want to believe that there are simple solutions to complex problems. And when desperation has disposable income, market opportunities abound.

AT DESPAIR, INC., we believe motivational products create unrealistic expectations, raising hopes only to dash them. That's why we created our soul-crushingly depressing Demotivators(R) designs, so you can skip the delusions that motivational products induce and head straight for the disappointments that follow!

Actually, the scary thing is that some of these demotivators are dead-on accurate:

APATHY - If we don't take care of the customer, maybe they'll stop bugging us.

BEAUTY - If you're attractive enough on the outside, people will forgive you for being irritating to the core.

MISTAKES - It could be that the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others.

MEDIOCRITY - It takes a lot less time and most people won't notice the difference until it's too late.

MEETINGS - None of us is as dumb as all of us.

FAILURE - When your best just isn't good enough.

IDIOCY - Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

LEADERS - Leaders are like eagles. We don't have either of them here.

VISION - How can the future be so hard to predict when all of my worst fears keep coming true?

The most "motivating" of all...

WINNERS - Because nothing says "you're a loser" more than owning a motivational poster about being a winner.

And finally...

BLOGGING - Never before have so many people with so little to say said so much to so few.

Oops, almost forgot this one...

INSPIRATION - Genius is 1 percent inspiration and 99% perspiration, which is why engineers sometimes smell really bad.

Actually I do like a line from the initial blurb:

... when desperation has disposable income, market opportunities abound.

So, what motivates you? Or, what really demotivates you?

-- Jack Krupansky